There are many stereotypes of what the holiday season is “supposed to” be like. We see it in movies, watch it on television, and now we are also exposed to other people’s expectations and holiday ideas and pictures on social media. In this day and age, when we have so much information about what other people are doing in their daily lives, it is easy to start to compare what we have with what others have, and this can lead to uncomfortable feelings that what we have is somehow less than what others have.
I admit it: I love looking at ideas people post for decorating their homes, their smiling children sitting with the mall Santa, and pictures of Christmas morning or New Year’s Eve. However, I also notice that as I peruse these pictures or read about how to make homemade potpourri that smells like eggnog, my own decorations or plans for Christmas somehow start to feel inferior. My kids are fairly shy and do not smile while they sit on a stranger’s lap–even if it is Santa Claus! My house, while cozy and warm, does not look like a magazine spread. I’m lucky if I get Christmas shopping done before Christmas Eve let alone make homemade anything, and I have not been out on New Year’s Eve for quite a few years!
So what can we do to protect our own mental health in the face of the barrage of selfies and information about other people’s holiday experiences? Here are a few tips:
- Remember that what is seen on social media is not always representative of reality. I’m as guilty as the next person for posting pictures that I feel portray me (and my family) in the best light.
- Remind yourself of what your priorities are. You most likely could have what other people do – but at what cost? Is it something that is important to you? Maybe you are feeling a bit jealous of someone who is spending New Year’s in Hawaii. Consider what you would give up to have the same vacation – perhaps that money is being spent on sending your child to hockey or paying for something else that is important to you. If there are things that are important to you to include in your holiday experience, make time for them. Maybe it’s putting up a Christmas tree together with your family or tobogganing on one of the city’s great hills.
- Be aware of what you are grateful for in your life. When we pay attention to what we do not have, it becomes very easy to forget what we do have. Maybe you have a family member who always puts a lot of thought and effort into giving amazing but inexpensive gifts. Perhaps you have a friend who always calls on Christmas no matter what. It could be that you have not thought about the great family traditions you would like to revitalize this year. Remind yourself of what it is that you are grateful for in your life and soon you will have less time to worry about what everyone else is doing.
For more tips on peace of mind throughout the holidays, check out this post from the Canadian Mental Health Association.